Recently I read an article on the Working Moms Site that spoke of a mom stop doing all the housework and the actions that followed.
When I saw the headline, my soul dropped…
As moms, we are often thrust into the role of the “goto” girl and everyone comes to us with their shit..
Give me a yes girl or hand raise emoji in the comments if you’re feeling this.
You barely have time for you yet you are somehow expected to create time for everyone else.
In this article (which I’ve shared in the resource section below) starts with a mom stating that two days prior to her first tweet she had stopped making all the meals and doing all the cleaning.
Now I don’t know the convo that preceded this event or if one happened at all and she just got fed up. But this mom took the plunge and stopped doing everything.
She did this stand-off with her family for over 36 days. Finally, her husband begin to pick up the slack and get things done around the house.
Hearing that makes me itch because there is a better way.
Now without judgement cuz I don’t know this woman’s life story nor do I know the full deets. Mom judgement ain’t my thing, I am solely using this post as a teaching tool.
I have done this type of standoff myself, my husband wasn’t pulling his weight around the house at all, and it was pissing me off. At the time, we had 3 kids, and I was always exhausted because housework and managing a home and a family is a never ending job.
I talk a lot about this in the book, “The Rising Sisterhood: How to step into your own power and change your narrative *
So, talking to a few other mom friends, the decision was made for me to stop doing all housework…
Let me tell you how long that lasted, being the mom of 2 high touch autistic kids and one infant, not long.
In fact, I ended up more frustrated with more shit to do.
My husband just thought I was in a mood and nothing changed.
Now I’ve done different variations
I’ve done the slamming and throwing things mode, cleaning the house singing Jasmine Sullivan at the top of my lungs, and you want to know which method worked best?
The method of me having a series convo with hubby with all that I did around the house and voicing where I needed his support.
I did this convo without blaming, and minimal tears. I did this convo fully being aware of the load he had and being really honest with myself that based on his schedule how he could show up.
Out of this convo I got:
✨ A husband that is responsive, he sees something wrong and he fixes it, no longer waiting for me to direct him.
✨ Kids that do their own laundry, clean their own bathroom and the kitchen without heavy prompting.
✨ My peace of mind hours back in my life and the opp to enjoy my family and not resent them.
See ladies the answer often isnt’ in the silent treatment or walking around all day with an attitude.
The answer is in the clarity of your conversation.
Let’s keep this conv going…share in the comments below how do you want your family to support you?
I’m listening and am here to support you toward your next best moves.
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I you know you need more support to Get Yo’ Life….
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Well girl, it’s time to take action, you can listen to YouTube vids all day to get “motivated” or you can start taking action right where you stand.
The only way to eliminate the stress and overwhelm you feel in your day is to take clear intentional action.
I’ll talk to you later girl…Bye