How does a mom entrepreneur stay focused when life throws her a curveball? Life always has a way of throwing you a curveball when you least expect it. You’re going smoothly on the road of life, and bam you hit a pothole that sends you veering into a ditch.
How do you handle changes to your plan? Do you breathe and push forward? Do you throw a fit and stay there? Do you immediately begin to search for solutions?
Well, just recently my family and I experienced one of the largest life potholes. On September 13, 2018, our oldest son Marcus, Jr shed this earthly form. It was a normal Thursday morning, we were getting ready for school and everyone was excited about it being “pizza Thursday”. As I made my normal rounds going to each kids room to knock on their door prompting them to get ready for school. My youngest popped out of bed, my oldest moaned good morning, but there was no reply from Marcus’ room.
Although it wasn’t his normal he’d had sleepy days before so I just figured it was one of those days. As I opened his door my heart dropped as I saw him slumped on the floor lifeless. My life went from 0 to 100 in 2.5 seconds flat.
Because I’m a solutions-oriented kind of girl I focused on my lesson from this and my next steps. Adversity will always be around but you must make the decision to rise above it all. I’m not telling you I’ve been cool, calm, and collected during this entire process. I have good days and bad, some days I’m embracing life and others I struggle to get out of bed.What I know for sure is, my goal is to live fully in the good days so the bad days aren’t so crippling. Click To Tweet
How I Stay Focused to Make It Through Life
What I’m going to share isn’t just for grief. I have used these same tools and resources to make it through the normal life curves. It’s important to have a foundation for your life. Having a foundation gives you a place to come back to when life gets crazy.
1. Definite Purpose
Having a definite purpose is your North Star, it will allow you to always have a space to come back to. Your definite purpose will help you stay focused on your purpose when life happens. It will keep you from going too far off the deep end and remind you of where you desire to be.
A definite purpose is different than just writing a SMART goal. Don’t get me wrong SMART goals are awesome and will get the job done. A definite purpose has 4 major components
- A clear statement of what you’re working toward
- What you plan to give in return for the thing you desire
- The date you want this to manifest
- A clear plan for carrying out your desire that you are ready to put in action at once.
You take those four components and write it out into a clear, concise statement of:
- what you desire
- what you plan to give in return
- the date of manifestation
- the plan to make it happen.
If you want to learn more about creating a definite purpose statement grab the book, “Think and Grow Rich” , by Napoleon Hill. You’ll learn about definite purpose and other mind shifting principles in chapter two of the book on Desire.
2. Support System
As humans, we are not alone, it’s important in any journey you embark on that you have the support of others. Create a container for your life now that allows you to have support in multiple areas. There is no one coach, mentor, or group that can be your everything. Each person has their strengths in how they can support you.
3 Emotional Foundations – Feelings are so important because everything we do is either taking us closer or further away to how we say we want to feel. When you know how you want to feel it allows you to seek out high-quality tasks to get you there.
On the rough days after my son’s death knowing how I wanted to feel allowed me to ebb and flow through the bad days with more grace and ease. Knowing how you want to feel will keep you from getting stuck in low-level activities.
My best resource for getting in touch with creating strong emotional foundations is The Desire Map, by Danielle LaPorte. This book walks you through creating what Danielle calls you Core Desired Feelings. These will be the feelings that help guide you to creating a truly empowered life. If you want a sneak peek into feelings check out my blog post Emotional Clarity 101.
4. Feeding Your Mind
During this time I have kept my vibration high listening to and learning from awesome books and podcasts. You must continue to feed your mind in the direction you want to go. You must also learn from people that have been where you are or want to go on a consistent basis. Learning is a perpetual job.
My favorite podcast from my coach/mentor Chris Michael Harris is Entrepreneur Hour. In this episode, he works with his awesome wife and my other coach/mentor Kimberly Ann Jimenez founder of The Business Lounge to dig deep into flowing through a life change.
This episode was so meaningful to me and has touched everyone I’ve shared it with that I had to share it with all of you. Check out the podcast below.
Knowing that when tough times come you can’t give up that you must keep your eyes on the prize and take action. Keeping connected to media that will feed your mind and fuel your growth is what will keep you going. You are going to need the media to support this crazy journey.
Self-Care is more than a spa day, a sleep-in day, or a lunch date with the girls. Self-care is a moment by moment, day by day commitment. Working until you’re a zombie or ignoring the needs of yourself, your family or your marriage will not make you successful. Learn what your body, mind, and spirit need to keep it running smoothly and do those things often, not just when you’re stressed out.
Entrepreneurship as a mom is not an easy gig. Not only do you have to contend with the forces of business you must contend with the force of family. I get that sometimes it seems like you’ll never be able to truly strike a harmonious balance between your family and business but it’s possible. You don’t have to burn out or ignore your family or health to grow your business.
Having a solid foundation will allow you to reach your goals and handle life changes with little to no interruption or stress. When you have a foundation in place you’ll be able to ebb and flow with ease.
Check out my latest Facebook vid to grab some quick takeaways and more nuggets to help support your life journey.
Over to You
Share in the comments below:
What do you feel is your biggest challenge with handling life changes?
Do you feel like you can’t regain your center or do unexpected things come at you faster than you can handle?
I’m ready to hear how I can support you in creating a life that flows.
If you’re looking to get useful resources and tips to help you create true balance in your life enter your info below to get my Monthly Balance Resource Guide.